Last Wednesday, in the midst of work I got Angeline's short text like: Are you free tonight? I replied saying I have nothing in particular to do, so, yes. She told me God let her won 2 free tickets! In the back of my mind, I knew what's coming. Ceng ceng ceng...free movie treat!!! =) We watched 'I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry'. We enjoyed ourselves very much. We got 50% of the cinema all to ourselves (there were only 4 ppl)!
Since knowing Wini, we have learnt from her that it's always good to process while and after watching a movie. Sometimes I'll forget to do that and it happened to us then. On our way out of the cinema, Angeline went: Oh, I forgot to process! Heh. Me too.
After so many days, the very one thing that's on top of my mind ever since I left the cinema was a scene in the movie where Larry took out his late wife's clothes from the wardrobe, kissing and putting them away in tears. In the movie, Larry's wife passed away for 3 years but there seemed to be no changes to her stuffs, Larry still keeps her clothes and all, where they were.
What's wrong with that? You may ask. Personally, I find the message hitting home. So much so that I see Larry in me. Unable to let go. Sometimes while having some random thoughts running through my mind, I tend to have the tendency to dwell, reminiscing over and over again in my mind's eye as if I could see myself right where I was back in time and space. Exactly as to what I would not share here b'cos it's too private.
I remember an illustration Max Lucado used in one of his books saying that whether you realise it or not, we all are carrying a sack. Day in and day out. Sometimes without us even realising it. It's the sack full of rocks, stones, and boulders. Each representing our worries, burdens, anxieties...Same goes in this scenario, just that the content now represents that of our memories, both good and unpleasant ones.
I've loaded my sack pretty much. I get a bit breathless carrying them sometimes. I forgot that I can give them all to one person. On and on I added to my sack. It's time for me to seek refuge and do the unloading. God, thank you for awakening me.
It's good to have memories, even more so if it's a good one. But if it only crippled my growth spiritually, it's less than healthy to continue holding unto them. So, I want to let go. Because with God, truly, the best is yet to come.
2 comments:
Hi girl...good to know you've learnt something from me..hehe..but letting go..ya..sometthing I'm in the process myself..letting go of something in the past..so painful..but It's like in the storage room in my heart..i keep these things in boxes..and it time to sort through the clutter..take them out..look at them..remember..shed a tear and put it away for good. painful but needful!
I just found out u commented. Yep. painful but needful =)
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